8 Weeks: Face it -- You're rude

So a quick State of Pregnancy update before I head off into a rant.
A. The real, crazy nausea has certainly set in. I'm lucky if I can get water down. I guess I should be grateful that it's not coming back up? Whatever.
B. I didn't think I could be more tired than week 6. Turns out, I can be.
C. The Bean is the size of a grape, is growing her lungs and neural pathways this week. She also lost her tail. R.I.P. shrimpy tail.

On to the issue at hand....
So I have been faced with the dreaded "When are you due?" question from strangers. The reason this is so dreaded is that I was dealing with that question well before I was pregnant. My body type has always given the illusion that I am with child. This apparently allows any Joe Schmoe to inquire about my due date. It used to bother me because I was aware that I was just chubbo in the belly and that people were hoping it was something much more adorable than that. Fine. I liked to answer with something ridiculously morbid like "Oh. The due date WOULD HAVE been...." Awful I know. But after about 10 strangers feeling the need to ask, I lost my sense of respect or tact (since they didn't seem to have any either). It was a running joke amongst my peers.
Fast forward to now, where I am actually 2 months pregnant. I look exactly the same as before (obviously) but now when someone asks, at least I don't feel like a fraud because I do indeed have a due date. Alas!
Well at least I thought I was out of the woods. Oh no my friend. It has turned into something MUCH more rude that just "when are you due?" Now, all of a sudden a due date isn't good enough. It doesn't suffice to stop the douche that has just assumed I was pregnant - they should be thankful I AM pregnant and not offended at the question.
Lucky for you, you can stop now Ms. McDoucherson.
No way. Why would they do that when they can go on to say "Oh really? You look MUCH farther along/um is it twins/did you say December???" Seriously folks. That is the direct equivalent of saying "You are fat." Try to sugar coat it all you want but the fact of the matter is, you just insulted me in a way that makes YOU feel ok with yourself. If I was indeed "just fat" and not growing a baby, you would be that jerk that just pointed out the obvious "Hey, you're fat. In case you didn't know."
So to all of you that say things like "Oh my gosh you're so big!" or "Really? You shouldn't be showing that early" or "Wow. I only gained 3 pounds by week 20" I say SUCK IT and GOOD DAY TO YOU. Because the truth of the matter is, I can pick YOU out of a line up. I know which of YOU say these sorts of things thinking you are cute or somehow clued into how each and every pregnant body should work. And usually..... "you're fat. In case you didn't know."



"There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and his mother's age." ~ Dr. Benjamin Spock